Money Smart Parenting

Listen to it, don’t feel it. If you feel it, you pass it to your child. So just listen to it, and when you are done, let that be the end of it. Don’t let it ruin your small family, don’t let it reflect on what you do. Do not show it; if you do, then that’s it. It is already passed to your child, who will be tasked to break something that you can break now.

Breaking generational trauma requires a deep and multifaceted approach that demands mindfulness and conscious actions. It begins with acknowledging the profound pain and challenges handed down to us from previous generations. It’s difficult to confront these burdens, as they can weigh heavily on our hearts and minds. I know firsthand how overwhelming it can be, how it can feel like an impossible mountain to climb.

Listening becomes a vital tool in this process, but it’s not just passive hearing—it’s about active, attentive listening. It means creating a space where we can truly understand and empathize with the experiences of those who came before us without allowing ourselves to be consumed by the overwhelming emotions accompanying the trauma. It’s about finding a delicate balance between acknowledging the pain and preventing it from overwhelming us.

One of the greatest challenges lies in recognizing that generational trauma has the power to persist through emotional inheritance. When we allow ourselves to be overwhelmed by these emotions, we unwittingly pass them on to our children, burdening them with the same struggles we have endured. It’s a heavy responsibility to bear, knowing that our actions and emotions can shape their lives and perpetuate the cycle of pain.

But there is hope. We can break this cycle. We can protect our kids from the destructive influence of generational trauma. It starts with consciously refusing to let it fill our daily lives, creating a haven where our loved ones can flourish without being held back by the weight of the past. It means making deliberate choices and demonstrating through our actions that they need not inherit the pain and limitations imposed upon us.

I understand the impulse to express our pain openly, wear it as a badge of honor, or seek validation. But every display, whether intentional or not, can become a channel through which the trauma flows into the hearts and minds of our children. It’s difficult to resist that urge, but by doing so, we spare them the burden of breaking what we have the power to address and break ourselves now.

Breaking generational trauma is not easy, but I want to encourage you to believe in your strength and resilience. Despite the challenges, you possess the capacity to actively listen, absorb, and understand the complexities of this trauma without allowing it to consume you. By nurturing a mindset of resilience, you create a shield for your family, paving the way for healing and growth. Together, we can empower our children to embrace a future free from the shackles of the past. We can leave behind a legacy of strength, resilience, and liberation. While the road may be long and difficult, know that you have the power within you to make a difference.